And Here it Comes..

Sometimes there are mornings where you wake up and you know exactly who you are.
You may feel less than in control, the pieces you spent half a lifetime collecting seem scattered, and  the worry stubbornly pounds in your chest. Yet you set your eyes on the sun, you feel the warmth of day, and you know, for a brief moment, who you are and what you want out of life. Then comes the creeping bittersweet, like biting into a green apple-- crisp and sweet but tart to taste, the sort that makes your lips purse and your tongue curl. It is that tongue curl, that bittersweet, that reminds you of the beauty and value in simple things-- like waking up to the sun or eating apples.

And in your heart of hearts, there is a knowing; you acknowledge that some things cannot remain as though they are, and that all things must inevitably change. You feel, from your soul to your fingertips, some dawning or birthing on the tip of your tongue. The sort of feeling, as the sun casts pure light over the morning, where you know something is coming and that you must, with arms wide open, embrace the rushing tide or be drug under by its force. That looming, beautiful strength that has the fiercest powers to create or destroy. And you feel the very breath of God on your neck; a comforting breeze of tenderness and warmth, but pushing, all the while, like pressure on a rock in a deep dark place. And you understand what all the heart pangs and growth pains were for-- forming all the while to make this rough and shining gem. A pearl formed in the quiet solitude of the darkest depths.

Through the night tears, the fearful wandering and the hand-wringing, you stand here at the edge of this cliff, knowing your next move must be to jump if you ever hope to fly. You must not fear the crash if you have any desire to know the wind in your wings; but the breeze makes you shiver and the height is dizzying.  And yet, how sweet is the love that compels you, and you know, with that same knowing of apples and dawn, that you will jump. You feared all of your life that this would come and you would fail, that you might miss the chance to prove brave, to test true. But there are cliffs all your life to be jumped from, and they were made for you-- for the time that you might know what it feels like to trust, and love, and truly be... to be the fullest you, to go high and far and deep and wide... to sincerely know the love of God, and to what fullness it forms you, heals you, reaches into you and pulls out the best things. Perfect love casts out all fear.


Things are changing, as they always have, but your wings are feathered and your heart is full. So fear not, knowing that you were made to jump, to fly, and ultimately... to be free. That what is for you will not be kept from you. You must know exactly, without shadow of doubt that plagued you so full and far with all its feeble threats to come again, that this is the dawning day of all that you are. So come, child, greet the dawn, the swelling tide, this looming cliff, this open sky. This great big God love that compels you into breathing and being.

Let go, and fly.